发布时间：2019-07-31 08:53:49
Clever Bobby
Brown was very proud of his young son. Once he was talking to a visitor, telling the man how clever his son was.
"The boy is only two years old," he said, "and knows all animals. He's going to be a great naturalist. Here, let me show you."
He took a book of natural history from the bookshelf, placed Bobby on his knee, opened the book and showed him a picture of a giraffe(长颈鹿).
"What's that, Bobby?"
"Horsey," said Bobby. Next of a tiger was shown, and Bobby said, "Pussy." Then Brown showed Bobby a picture of lion, and Bobby said, "Doggy." And when a picture of a chimpanzee was shown, Bobby said, "Daddy!"
聪明的博比
布朗非常欣赏他的小儿子。一次他和一位客人聊他的儿子有多聪明。 布朗说：“他只有两岁，就认识所有的动物了。他长大一定会是一个出色的自然学家。来，我让你看看。”
他从书架上拿下一本自然书，把博比抱到膝上，打开书。指着一张长颈鹿的画片。
“博比，这是什么?” “马马，”博比回答。 他又指了一张老虎的画片，博比回答说：“猫咪。” 然后布朗又指了一张狮子的画片，博比说：“狗狗。” 他又指了一张黑猩猩的画片，博比说：“爸爸!”
The Author's Son
The kind bishop1 intimately asked an author's son, "Do you want to bee an author like your father?"
"No," replied the author's son.
"Then what is your ambition, my little man?" said the bishop.
"I want to bee a famous person, then anything I write will be printed," frankly2 replied the hopeful little boy, wise beyond his age.
作家的儿子
和蔼友善的主教亲切地问一位作家的儿子：“你想成为一个像你父亲一样的作家吗?”
作家的儿子回答说：“不想。”
主教说：“那你有什么志向呀，小家伙!”
这个早慧的对未来充满希望的男孩坦率地回答说：“我要成为一个有名的人，那时无论我写什么，都会被刊载和出版。”
A school report
The father was reading the school report which had just been handed to him by his hopeful son. His brow was wrathful(愤怒的) as he read,
"English, poor. French, weak. mathematics, fair." and he gave a glance of disgust at the quaking lad(少年，小伙子).
"Well, Dad." said the son, "It is not as good as it might be, but have you seen that?" And he pointed to the next line which read, "health, excellent."
学校成绩单
父亲在看他那满怀希望的儿子带回来的学校成绩单。他边看边露出愤怒的表情：
“英语，差;法语，差;数学，中。”他厌恶地瞥了在发抖的儿子一眼。
“爸爸，”儿子说，“可能成绩不够理想。但您看到那一项了吗?”他指了指下一行：“健康状况，优。”
斯威夫特博士与小厮
a wealthy old lady who lived near dr. swift used to send him presents occasionally by her servant. dr. swift took her presents but never gave the boy anything for his trouble. one day as swift was busy with his writing, the boy rushed into his room, knocked some books out of their place, threw his parcel on the desk and said, my mistress has sent you two of her rabbits.在斯威夫特博士家附近，有一位富有的老妇人，她时常打发仆人给他送礼物。斯威夫特博士接受她的礼物，但从不给小厮任何酬谢。一天，斯威夫特博士正忙着写东西，小厮冲进了他的房间，把书一扒拉，将一个包裹扔在书桌上，说道：我的女主人送给你两只兔子。swift turned round and said, my boy, that is not the way to deliver your parcel（包裹） . now, you sit in my chair, watch my way of doing it and learn your lesson. 斯威夫特转过身来说：孩子，包裹可不是这样送法呀。现在，你坐在我的椅子上，看看我是怎么送的，并要记取这个教训。the boy sat down. swift went out, knocked on his door and waited. the boy said, e in. the doctor entered, walked to his desk and said, if you please sir, my mistress sends her kind regards and hopes you will accept these rabbits which her son shot this morning in her fields.小厮坐了下来，斯威夫特走出去，敲了敲门，等待回音。小厮说进来。博士进了门，走到桌旁说道：先生，我的女主人向您致以亲切的问候，并希望您收下这些兔子，这是她儿子今天早晨在地里打的。the boy answered, thank you, my boy, give your mistress and her son my thanks for their kindness and here is two shillings for yourself.小厮回答说：谢谢你，我的孩子。向你的女主人和她的儿子致谢，谢谢他们的关心。这两个先令是送给你本人的。the doctor laughed, and after that, swift never forgot to give the boy his tip.博士笑了，打那以后，斯威夫特从没忘记送小费给小厮。干净的杯子
joe and fred were helping to build a house in a village. the weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have their lunch. they found the nearest small bar, went in and sat down with their sandwiches.乔和佛瑞德在一个村子里帮忙盖一间房子。天气很暖和，到处都有许多灰尘。12点半的时候，他们觉得非常口渴，便停下来去吃午饭了。他们找到最近的一家酒吧，走进去坐下吃他们的三明治。good afternoon, gentlemen. what can i get you? the man behind the bar asked.下午好，先生。你们想要点什么？柜台后面的伺应问道。
joe looked at fred and said, beer, i think. yes, a pint of beer each. is that all right for you, fred?乔看了看佛瑞德说：我想，啤酒吧。好，那就每人一品脱啤酒。这样可以吗，佛瑞德？yes, that's all right. fred said. then he turned to the man behind the bar and said, and i want it in a clean glass! don't forget that.好的，可以。佛瑞德说。然后他转过去跟柜台后面的侍应说：我要啤酒装在一个干净的杯子里！别忘了。the man behind the bar filled the glasses and brought them to joe and fred. then he said. which of you asked for the clean glass?柜台后面的侍应倒满杯子后，拿给乔和佛瑞德，接着说：刚才哪一位要干净的杯子的？世界上最伟大的击剑手
At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage.
在一场世界推荐击剑手表演中，排名第三的击剑手上场了。
A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half.
一只苍蝇放了出来，剑划了一个弧，他将苍蝇劈成了两半。
The crowd cheered.
观众欢呼起来。
Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters.
紧接着排名第二的人将一只苍蝇切成了四半。
A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.
现场一阵沉默，人们期盼着世界上最伟大的击剑手出场。
His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast.
他的剑锋以一个巨大的弧线划了下来--然而那只昆虫还在继续飞行!观众被惊呆了。
The greatest swordsman had missed his target pletely,
观众被惊呆了。最伟大的击剑手完全错过了他的目标，
yet he continued to smile.
然而他还在微笑着。
"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled.
“你为什么这么高兴?”有人嚷道，
"You missed!"
“你没击中!”
"Ah," replied the swordsman,
“啊，”剑手答道，
"you weren't watching very carefully.
“你刚才没有很仔细地看。
They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father.
苍蝇还活着，是的--但他永远也做不成爸爸了。
呵呵呵呵呵呵~好搞笑啊！笑死我了！？在英语对话么呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵，太好玩了
I'm Trying to Stop It"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?""No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."“孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了吗？”“没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。”“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”“Yes ，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”TWO： Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example?John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short.老师：我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理。现在，谁给我举个例子？约翰：嗯，在夏天天都长，在冬天天都短。请问能描述的详细一点吗？5127见好不好你保护费